Sermon for March 20th (Church Discipline : How?)

“Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently. But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted.” Last week, I talked to you about the importance of having boundaries even in a faith community—especially in a faith community. I showed you how, in the Bible, God’s discipline is considered a necessary part of life to reflect his love and concern for His children. We were encouraged, through readings by the apostle Paul, to follow God’s call to hold people in our faith community accountable for actions that go against the clear commands of God. Why? Because our actions as a Christians can either lead others TO Christ or lead them AWAY from Christ and our community is called to love both God’s holy name and the well-being of our friends and neighbors.

Today, the question is not “Why?” is there church discipline but instead “How?” How does a church effectively discipline a member? How might you, as an individual, privately confront a Christian friend, family member or acquaintance while at the same time not being tempted to sin yourself. Finally, we need to understand how we might respond ourselves if we are ever disciplined by someone else or even by the church itself.

Jesus explains the first step in how to do church discipline in the gospel of Matthew, chapter 18, “If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over.” Let’s just stop there. Do you hear the hope in these words? That hope is the point of all this talk about church discipline. It is the good news in all of this. In Ezekiel, God maintains that forgiveness and reconciliation are always His main goal in the life of every person, “Do I take any pleasure in the death of the wicked? Declares the Sovereign Lord. Rather, am I not pleased when they turn from their ways and life?” We should all be pleased, thrilled and overjoyed when a sin is pointed out and then stopped. Jesus said, “If they listen to you, you have won them over” but I’d say that whenever a person stops sinning and repents we ALL win.

Jesus explains what to do when you see or experience another Christian in your community acting sinfully in a public way (especially if it has happened more than one): Confront the person privately and gently. Understand this: if you are more interested in talking ABOUT a person’s sins with others and have no intention of going to them face to face, you are under the same judgment as they are. Church Discipline is always—ALWAYS—about creating peace and harmony again within a community rather than belittling someone, making someone feel guilty, putting them down before others or making oneself look better. Paul points out in Galatians chapter 6, “you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently. But watch yourselves, or you may also be tempted.” Church discipline is done for the good of the person being confronted, so that they might find themselves back in a good relationship with God. It is not done in order to pit the church against someone or one group against another.

It is a temptation to become prideful, arrogant and judgmental of a person when you are confronting them about a sin so WATCH OUT. If you are out for revenge or to “make an example of them” you’d be better off to leave the discipline to someone else rather than be a divisive influence on your community. In the book of Titus, we read, “Warn a divisive person once, and then warn him a second time. After that have nothing to do with him. You may be sure such a man is warped and sinful; he is self condemned.” My internship supervisor always said that when you point the finger at someone else, there are three fingers pointing back at you. With that in mind, if you care enough about someone else that you feel the need to confront them about a sin, do it gently and with great humility as one broken down sinner speaking to another. Remember this: the only hope either of you have lies in the blood of Jesus on the cross.

It is also important that we are graceful with people and do not start calling everything a sin. Let’s take gossip for instance. This sin can be very destructive in a community and we want to be careful about it. However, I want you all to understand that it is important to be able to confide in other people. We have a need, as human beings, to tell our problems to other caring individuals as well as to seek advice and counsel from other Christians. That’s what friends and family are for. Maybe you’ve been upset with someone for something that they have done to you. Telling you spouse, or pastor, or friend is not gossip as long as you are not trying to tell everyone you see. We must be careful to discern what is a sin and what is not. However, if you are the hearer you have a responsibility and a warning.

You are responsible to hold these feelings, this hurt, this anger, this frustration and this helplessness confidentially. “Carry each other’s burdens,” Saint Paul says, “and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.” If someone comes to you hurt and angry with another person, don’t immediately judge them. Listen to them, pray with them, counsel with them if you desire, but explain that, while you will share their burden, you will not give it away to others. Gossip only occurs when people are not willing to carry burdens, but want to spread it around. In that case, gossip becomes a very infectious disease. It’s difficult not to want to take a shared burden and turn it intojuicy gossip that others are interested in. It’s hard not to find yourself burning in anger after hearing one side of a story that seems unjust. But if you are not willing to carry someone’s burden confidentially, tell them so, so that you do not risk falling into sin. Sometimes church discipline means self-discipline.

After confronting a person about a sin one on one, Jesus says to “take one or two others along, so that every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.” What is the purpose of this step? To present the opportunity for reconciliation again! We must always hold out hope for repentance and forgiveness even when all things seem out of control. Having another person in the room holds all accountable for their words and having another person there to mediate can sometimes make all the difference. Once again, don’t do this to gang up on someone. In fact, don’t do it at all if your goal is not reconciliation and restoration.

Jesus says, “If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector.” First of all, can you see that any public church discipline wouldn’t happen until more private actions have failed? Remember Saint Paul’s words, “If someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently.”

This is an especially important point to make clear: a faith community is not a police state. Do you understand this? We are sinners, not perfect people. Mistakes will be made, morals compromised and sins committed over and over again both in private and in public by all of us. We aren’t looking for a community of tattle-tales or whistle-blowers who care more about their own self-righteous pride than good relationships with others. Jesus talks about this kind of church in the second chapter of Revelation, the church in Ephesus, “I know your deeds, your hard work and your perseverance. I know that you cannot tolerate wicked men, that you have tested those who claim to be apostles but are not, and have found them false. You have persevered and have endured hardships for my name, and have not grown weary. Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love.” In our efforts to hold one another accountable, it will be easy to forget to love one another. In our efforts to judge one another, we might forget to forgive and, thus, miss the entire point.

Saint Paul says this another way in the book of 2nd Thessalonians, “If anyone does not obey our instructions in this letter, take special not of him. Do not associate with him, in order that he may feel ashamed. Yet do not regard him as an enemy, but warn him as a brother.” Do not regard each other as enemies, but as brothers and sisters in Christ even if you believe that your brother or sister is sinning against you! Church Discipline must be done out of love, respect and compassion and never out of anger, self-righteousness or revenge. “Watch yourselves or you will be tempted to sin.”

Finally, I must briefly talk about how to deal with church discipline if you are the one disciplined. We all come under God’s judgment for our sins, both known and unknown to others. (Examples of Adam, Cain and Judas)

On the other hand, King David was famously confronted by the prophet Nathan after having an affair with a woman and then killing her husband. After Nathan called him out on his sin, what did the most powerful man in the nation do? You see, David didn’t have to listen. He could’ve gotten angry and killed or imprisoned the prophet for his judgmental words. I mean, David was king! He could do whatever he wanted! But, instead, what did David do? First, he confessed his sin before his friend and admitted his wrongdoing, “Have mercy on me, O God, according to your unfailing love; according to your great compassion blot out my transgressions.”

King David repented of his sins. He was punished for them by God, just as you and I sometimes bear the consequences of our sins years after we have stopped doing them, but his relationship with God was right again. If you feel God’s conviction on your heart right now for something you have done, or not done, for someone you have hurt or abused, the time has come to repent. Don’t wait for someone to call you to be accountable for it, confess your sins to God right now. He is slow to anger and abounding is steadfast love. And don’t just do it silently saying, “Well, God’s forgiven me!” Confess your sin before the ones you have hurt and do all you can to restore the relationships. Ask for their forgiveness. Turn away from this sin and turn back to life. Jesus came not for the righteous but sinners. Today, you are free to leave the darkness behind you and come into the light of Jesus Christ. We don’t come into church as perfect people, we come in broken and crippled with sin. Listen to the words of the son we are about to hear: (This is where the Healing Begins verse 1) As the song points out, you don’t come into a church already healed, but this place can be where your healing begins. Amen.